1 year ago

June 2018 - Going out to celebrate our 12th Wedding Anniversary

This was me one year ago.

Sure I don’t look much different. My hair is longer now and I am much leaner but what has changed is everything you can’t see.  Where my head was then compared to where it is now.  What my sleep was like. What my happiness level was. How many times I had meltdowns or fits of rage.  

Sure I look happy in the pictures but I was NOWHERE near the level of happiness I have writing this today. See in this past year I’ve done a lot for myself. Things I’ve never thought I would do.  Standing up to adversity, stepping out of my comfort zone, starting my own business.  I’m thinking about myself more now and I’m taking action. See, I didn’t know it at the time what saying yes to Arbonne was going to mean. What it continues to bring to me. But I am so, so grateful for that day, each and everyday.

At the time I was lost and searching. I would go shopping to fill a void and get a happiness high but then I’d get home and feel remorse about spending money that I shouldn’t be spending. I went on a yoga retreat to get clarity and only reaffirmed that I was lost and needed focus. I was bored and needing excuses to go out with friends, I got tired of running from playground to playground. To me, being home to raise my kids was important but I didn’t realize the cost. I lost so much of myself without even knowing it. But what’s worse, I lost my purpose. Is it selfish to say that I wanted more than just being a mother? What would everyone think? What could I do? Work for my husband? That wasn’t really an option. Go back to Progressive and the corporate world? No thanks, I need to be here for my family. I wasn’t even consciously aware that I wanted to go back work, I was just really lost.

During June I had met my friend, Ruth Anne for coffee. I was so excited to be out of the house and my kids with a sitter!! She knew I loved the products as a was a regular customer of my good friend Sarah. During the meeting she had asked me if I ever considered being an Arbonne Consultant. Don’t we all make preconceived notions about this line of work? I said I had considered it (which I think we all sort of do) but that decided it wasn’t for me. I didn’t want to pester my friends and family. She told me it really is about connecting to people, making relationships and sharing the products. Again I said no thanks. Ruth Anne then suggests I try this 30 Days to Healthy Living program they run since I’m so into health and fitness and I figured why not, I could use a cleanse and wouldn’t mind slimming down for summer.

Amazing decision #1. Doing this program really opened my eyes and my mind!! I was thinking clearly and my mood improved. I had so much energy!! Like I was back in college. I was happy and singing again. I really didn’t realize how poorly I was feeling until I felt better. So much better!! I was sleeping through the night and waking before my kids, I was preparing better meals for my families dinners. See we were already gluten free, it’s just I had gotten into a cycle of convenience gluten-free. We regularly had GF breads, crackers and cookies, sure I’d have a shake here and there but I was also having lots of dairy and sugar too. I bought organic sometimes and hit the farmers market less and less frequently. The best way to describe it, this program re-awoke me.

Out at East Side Rec for Theodores Kindergarten Picnic

This was the day I made the decision that really changed everything. I was talking to one of Theo’s classmates moms, Ashley, about this detox program I was doing. Telling her how amazing I was feeling, the weight I lost and that the protein was delicious. She was somewhat interested. So I told her I could send her more info. It was then!! That was the idea that sparked the fire!!! 

I thought if I could get this girl to buy protein from me maybe I could make some money for my family cuz the money was all I was thinking about at the time.

Amazing Decision #2 - Well, I ran home, texted my sponsor Ruth Anne, registered and again over text tried to figure out how to send this girl the info so she could buy the protein from me. I wrote up a lengthy email and sent it to her, not mentioning anything about potential discounts or buying options. In the end she didn’t buy the protein, which was fine but I had my first taste. I had made the decision.

It took some time for me to settle into what sharing Arbonne really meant and I have to admit I went about the wrong way.  Should have had a launch party!!! Create excitement and momentum from the beginning cuz creating it later is harder. But that’s my lesson learned.

Everything from that day has been a journey, a learning experience. To ask for time, to ask for support, to acknowledge my needs, to realize my wants, to ask for them.   What’s the best part? I am receiving them!!! 

It took something else, my business and want to be successful, to make me work on myself. Now I am journaling, now I am reading more than ever, now I am mindful and aware, now I am engaging in interesting conversation with people that inspire and motivate me. I am forever grateful I made the decision that day. I am writing to you from a much more well-rounded mind space. A clearer space. A happy space.  A thriving space.

I invite anyone who feels like they are struggling or lost to please reach out to me. You are not alone!! I understand you, I see you and I would love to help guide you to a world of thriving!!